A Modest Proposition
A MODEST PROPOSITION
to the People of Canada concerning
the Pervasive Ills and Divisions afflicting
the Nation, including but not limited to
the Anguish of a Land rent Asunder by
heinous Tax Bills,
Curtailment of Economic Opportunity,
the Plight of the Middle Classes, and
Quebec
It is with deep Anguish, criss-crossing this Great Nation, that one encounters a Myriad of Misconnected Individuals who, instead of attending to their Honest Livelihood, employ their Available Energies to misapplying a sense of Commercial Expertise. Cab-drivers investing in the Business of their Brothers-in-law, Bell-persons intent on becoming MBAs, Waiters and Waitresses seeking to possess their Own Bistros, Chamber-persons dreaming of Legal Careers, Cashiers yearning to assimilate Pension Funds, all these and many Others of their Kind seek Commercial Status, and not for its own but for Inappropriate Ends, rather than increasing their Skills and their Joy of Life. The Committee is Unanimous that his Grievous Condition, a Sore Festering in the Skin, Flesh and Marrow of the Nation, its Vile Consequences suffered by the Aged and the Young, indiscriminately infecting all Classes of Society, unmindful of the Sexual Preference and the Cultural Background or the Stated Belief System of its Victim, has by now incapcitated Our Common Wealth, that it threatens our very Dominion.The Committee is sick to its Collective Heart. After months of sometimes heated, sometimes sober Exchange with our Fellow Country-persons, followed by a period of Deliberation in Retreat, we are prepared to offer the following Analysis and Modest RECOMMENDATIONS, followed by a Supporting Analysis.Though the Nation is beleagured with Execrable Attitudes and Stances of many Expressions, including but not limitied to such Spectacles as politicians at the Pork Trough who think they are Watchful and Prudent, Ecclesiastics who offend against Children, Educators who deconstruct the Mind of the Future, Albertans who behave like Quebecois and Quebecoises, women who imitate Men, lawyers who engage with the Law, adults who think they are Adolescents, Quebecois and Quebecoises who think they are American, and men who imitate Men, these are for the Committee but symptoms of the Real Scourge confronting our National Weal, the Dispersal of Business Leaders who think only of the Bottom Line.
